I read once (maybe it was twice) that new arrivals to a foreign country are the most likely to write a book on its culture. Once you live in a place too long, you start to realize that your assumptions and hypotheses are about as accurate and useful as opinion polls: they might contain a semblance of the truth, but they hardly do justice to the issues they address.

Having lived in Vietnam for five months now, I am in the sweet spot. During that time, I have lived with a Vietnamese family without committing any grave cultural faux pas. I speak enough Vietnamese to prompt a double-take by passing tourists. I have read books written by foreigners that by and large agree with my own conclusions. I am hereby ready to make some pronouncements on this strange and wonderful culture.

A few weeks ago, thumbing past the Vietnamese channels on our cable television towards the English ones higher up the dial, an instantly recognizable theme song caught my ear. Half expecting to hear Bob Barker – arguably the greatest game show host of our time – reminding us to stymie rampant pet sex, my fingers hesitated on the remote control. But, of course, it wasn’t The Price is Right. It was the Vietnamese copycat version Hãy Chọn Giá Đúng, or, Choose The Right Price. It had the same set, the same games (remember Plinko, anyone?), the same yellow name tags, but no Bob Barker, no “NEW CAR!!”s, and stiffer, more typically Asian applause.

My implicit comprehension of Vietnamese culture led me to watch with amused interest, but without surprise. After all, there is probably no game show on American television better suited to the Vietnamese culture I know than that brilliant commercial-within-a-commercial.

The Communist Party of Vietnam (the only show in town, politically speaking) has been gradually opening up the Vietnamese economy by way of free market policies since the 1980’s. The strategy known as Đổi mới, or renovation, has led to an astounding upsurge in international trade. The newly-capitalist Vietnamese have embraced consumer goods with as much passion as their incomes allow, and price comparison rivals the weather as a favourite topic of conversation.

This is a country in which “How much money do you make?” is reportedly an acceptable question to ask an acquaintance (though I have never asked nor been asked this question). Certainly “How much did that cost?” is fair game. One of the first things we studied in our Vietnamese language classes was numbers, and I was quickly struck by how much the average conversation here revolves around numbers. Usually huge numbers. It takes around 16,000 Vietnamese đồng – yes, the currency is called the dong. I’ll take a minute for those with the maturity of a seventh-grader to stop guffawing – it takes around 16,000 VND to buy one American dollar, so prices above 60 USD quickly soar into the millions. Here you have to be a millionaire to buy a rice cooker.

My Vietnamese host family were early winners in this capitalist game. Luxury items scattered about the house include laptops, digital cameras and an Apple iPhone, not to mention the new car parked beneath the kitchen. They all attest to my host parents’ skill at playing the domestic stock market, which has been shooting up like a junkie [Ed: too far?] in recent years. Their combined salaries alone would never have bought these status symbols.

And so the spirit of Bob Barker has come to southeast Asia. According to my intimate knowledge of the Vietnamese national psyche, it comes as no surprise. If I may say so, though, I’ve never been a big fan of game shows.